Introduction: Beyond the Tables – Why This Matters to You
As seasoned players, we understand the thrill, the risk, and the inherent allure of the game. We’ve seen the highs and lows, the wins and the losses. We know that for some, the line between recreational gambling and a serious problem can blur quickly. That’s why, as experienced gamblers in New Zealand, understanding how to support a friend or family member struggling with gambling addiction is not just a matter of compassion; it’s a practical necessity. We’ve all likely encountered someone who’s let the game get the better of them, and knowing how to respond effectively can make all the difference. This isn’t about lecturing; it’s about equipping ourselves with the knowledge to navigate a difficult situation with empathy and informed action. It’s about being a mate, a family member, and a responsible player. Perhaps you’ve even enjoyed a flutter or two at a place like Shotz casino online, and understand the importance of responsible play.
Recognising the Signs: Spotting the Problem in Aotearoa
The first step in helping someone is recognising the problem. Problem gambling, like any addiction, manifests in various ways. In New Zealand, common indicators include:
- Increased Spending: A sudden or gradual increase in the amount of money spent on gambling, often exceeding their financial means.
- Chasing Losses: The desperate attempt to recoup losses by gambling more, a classic sign of escalating behaviour.
- Preoccupation: Constant thoughts about gambling, even when not actively playing. This can manifest as planning future bets, reliving past wins and losses, or fantasising about gambling.
- Withdrawal Symptoms: Experiencing irritability, anxiety, or restlessness when unable to gamble.
- Lying and Deception: Hiding the extent of their gambling from loved ones, or lying about the money spent.
- Relationship Problems: Gambling leading to conflict with family, friends, or colleagues.
- Financial Difficulties: Mounting debt, borrowing money from others, or selling possessions to fund their gambling.
- Neglecting Responsibilities: Failing to meet work, family, or social obligations due to gambling.
- Mood Swings: Experiencing significant changes in mood, such as depression, anxiety, or euphoria, related to gambling outcomes.
It’s crucial to understand that these signs aren’t always obvious. Sometimes, the problem is hidden, masked by shame or denial. As experienced gamblers, we’re often better placed to spot these subtle cues, the telltale signs that something isn’t right.
Initiating the Conversation: A Kiwi Approach
Once you suspect a problem, initiating a conversation is key. This is where a delicate touch, characteristic of the Kiwi approach, is essential. Avoid accusatory language. Instead, focus on your concern and observations. Here’s how to approach the conversation:
- Choose the Right Time and Place: Find a private, comfortable setting where you can talk without interruption. Avoid doing this when emotions are running high, like immediately after a big loss.
- Express Your Concern: Start by expressing your care and concern for the person. Use « I » statements to avoid placing blame. For example, « I’ve noticed you seem stressed lately, and I’m worried about you. »
- Share Your Observations: Gently mention the specific behaviours you’ve noticed. « I’ve noticed you’ve been talking about gambling a lot recently, and I’m concerned about how it’s affecting you. »
- Listen Actively: Allow the person to share their perspective without interruption. Listen empathetically and validate their feelings, even if you don’t agree with their actions.
- Avoid Judgement: Refrain from judging or criticising their behaviour. The goal is to understand, not to condemn.
- Be Prepared for Denial: The person may deny having a problem. Be patient and persistent, but don’t force the issue.
Providing Support: Practical Steps You Can Take
Having the conversation is just the beginning. Providing ongoing support is crucial for recovery. Here’s how you can help:
- Encourage Professional Help: Suggest seeking professional help from a gambling counsellor or therapist. The Problem Gambling Foundation of New Zealand (PGNZ) and other organisations offer free, confidential support.
- Offer Practical Assistance: Help them find resources, such as support groups or financial counselling. Offer to accompany them to appointments if they’re comfortable with it.
- Set Boundaries: While supporting them, it’s essential to set healthy boundaries. Don’t enable their behaviour by lending them money or covering up their losses.
- Educate Yourself: Learn about problem gambling and the recovery process. This will help you understand what they’re going through and how to best support them.
- Be Patient: Recovery from gambling addiction takes time and effort. Be patient and supportive throughout the process. There will be setbacks, but your presence can make a difference.
- Look After Yourself: Supporting someone with a gambling problem can be emotionally draining. Make sure you take care of your own well-being. Seek support from your own friends, family, or a therapist if needed.
Understanding the Resources: Navigating the New Zealand Landscape
New Zealand offers a range of resources for those struggling with gambling addiction and their families. Familiarising yourself with these resources is crucial. The Problem Gambling Foundation of New Zealand (PGNZ) is a primary source of support, offering counselling, education, and advocacy. Other organisations, such as the Salvation Army and various health providers, also provide assistance. The Department of Internal Affairs (DIA) regulates gambling in New Zealand and provides information on responsible gambling practices. Understanding the legal framework surrounding gambling in Aotearoa is also beneficial.
Specific Resources in Aotearoa
- Problem Gambling Foundation of New Zealand (PGNZ): Provides free counselling, support groups, and education.
- Gambling Helpline: A 24/7 phone and online support service.
- Department of Internal Affairs (DIA): Provides information on responsible gambling and gambling regulations.
- The Salvation Army: Offers counselling and support services for individuals and families affected by gambling.
Conclusion: A Call to Action for the Experienced Player
As experienced gamblers, we have a unique understanding of the risks and temptations of the game. We’re also in a position to recognise the signs of problem gambling and offer support to those who need it. By understanding the signs, initiating the conversation with care, providing practical support, and knowing the resources available in New Zealand, we can make a real difference in the lives of our friends and family members. This isn’t just about being a good mate; it’s about being a responsible member of the gambling community in Aotearoa. Let’s use our experience to help those who need it, fostering a culture of support and understanding within the world of gambling. Remember, the game is meant to be enjoyed responsibly. By supporting each other, we can ensure that enjoyment doesn’t turn into despair.
